Last year, I did non-resolutions–things I wasn’t going to focus on in 2018. That went over about as well as any of my normal resolutions do. Which just goes to prove that resolutions of any kind are kind of ridiculous. The average person just can’t sit down on January 1st and make decisions for their entire upcoming year. It’s just not realistic.
But it sure is goddamn fun, isn’t it?
So, in the spirit of the time of year, here are the “resolutions” I’m “making” for 2019 that I almost definitely will forget about by February!
Unlike in the past, I am actually, actively working on this, at the moment. I am trying very hard to get over this crippling fear I have around driving. That said, the fear is still crippling and I’m not a great driver on top of it. So, we’ll see how this goes.
This year, I’m kind of hustling to get that D–Degree, that is. In the past, I really slacked off, but I’m laying the classes on pretty thick and trying to get as many of them out of the way as soon as I possibly can this year, so that I can apply for transfer next fall (2020). My goal is to have a Bachelor’s degree in my hands by the time I am thirty-five and I don’t care how much blood I have to spill to do it.
Honestly, I don’t care if it’s just three bucks a month from generous coffee-buyers, I want to earn some extra scratch so I don’t feel completely useless. There’s something comforting about having even a few dollars going into your bank account that makes you feel like all hope is not lost. Someone, somewhere, is willing to pay you for something–and if one person is willing to, so is someone else, probably.
This includes things like meditation, prayer, spending more time in nature, reading spiritual books, maybe even talking to other living, breathing humans face-to-face. It does not mean going to church and listening to someone tell me how I should be living my life (which I’ll expand on in another post). Through 2018, I kind of poked my head back into spirituality and Providence and that connection, without really committing myself to anything. This year, I’d like to jump in head-first.
I mean, I’m fat and I’m okay with that. What I’m not super okay with is feeling the cold, clammy hands of death clenching around my heart every time I eat a cheeseburger. Pup is doing this Keto kind of thing. I’m actually thinking of going the exact opposite and doing a lean protein, low-fat, 98% vegetable thing. I love me some raw bell peppers and carrots, ya know? That’s not sarcasm, either. Those really are some of my favorite snacks when I can be bothered to cut them up. I also need to start watching the salt. And maybe I’ll just go full new-age-granola and take up yoga, too. Matt is taking a yoga class this semester and I kind of hate him a little bit because I wanted to sign up for yoga this semester, but I’m taking science classes instead.
Isn’t that every writer’s resolution all the time? All writers wish they could write more, unless they’re like Stephen King or JK Rowling who write full-time, in which case they’re probably okay with the amount of time they have for writing. The rest of us have bills to pay and hustles to maintain in addition to putting words down, so we do what we can when we can, and it’s not always as much as we’d like. I’m honestly thinking about setting up a daily word count for myself, kind of like with NaNoWriMo, but not as intense. Maybe something like 700 words a day? Just to keep the juices flowing and to keep me in the mind frame of, “Oh yea, I’m supposed to be writing a book.”
That seems like a hefty amount of resolutions, right? I think that’s a good place to stop.
Full disclosure, of course these are all things I really do plan to work on in the upcoming year. I’m just not going to carve them into stone or tattoo them on my face or anything like that, because resolutions just set us up for failure. Life happens and plans change. And when you resolve to do something, that’s a hardcore commitment. So, a lot of time, when life inevitably gets in the way of perfectly integrating these changes into our lives, it can get us down and make us feel guilty.
And I already used up all my guilt eating an entire bowl of chocolate cake batter. I don’t have time to feel guilty over planning out an entire year.
Happy New Year, kids. I hope 2019 treats you all with kindness and prosperity.
I love you all.
HEY! HEY! HEY! I WANT TO RECORD A Q&A! I’ve become enraptured with the idea of posting a video Q&A. With my actual, honest to goodness face and voice. Here’s the thing: I need questions! If there’s anything you want to know about me, ask it in the comments below and it will probably be included in the video. You have until January 26th to get your questions in!
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