Admittedly, I’m not very close with my family. I’m not in contact with my extended family and my relationship with my older brother is still strained from our mutual hatred of each other growing up (not to mention that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to really forgive him for the physical abuse I suffered at his hands for most of my childhood and adolescence).
But, I am pretty close with my parents. I know that the fact I can even say that is something to be thankful for. There are many people who aren’t close to their parents, or even who have to actively avoid their parents for one reason or another. Not everyone can say their parents are kind, or supportive, or even love them.
My parents love me and that’s a blessing.
I made kind of a funny joke when my mom joined the Facebook group Dungeon of Loom (which, by the way, is open to all bloggers and readers of blogs who appreciate a twisted, dark, or rude sense of humor–I keep forgetting to plug it here). I said that even though she’s not a blogger, my blog wouldn’t exist if she didn’t let my unemployed-college-student, starving-artist ass live with her rent free. Which is a funny little tongue-in-cheek jab at my lack of a career/money, but is also 110% true.
My mom lets me live with her completely rent free as long as I’m in school. And, I’m not just talking about she lets me crash in her spare room–we live in a one-bedroom apartment. There is no spare room.
My mother sleeps in the living room, with her bed and the recliner the only real seating we have out there if by some miracle guests come over. My mother gave me the only bedroom because she knows I need my privacy. She also buys all the food we both eat, puts money on the laundry card we both use, does the majority of the cleaning because I’m constantly doing homework or working on my book, pays for my cell phone bill, pays for the TV and internet…
Not to mention all the random shit she buys me just because she likes seeing me happy and she knows how much I love crystals or notebooks or weird ass chocolate that had potato chips in it.
I honestly would have died years ago if not for my mother’s kindness and generosity. This blog definitely wouldn’t exist, because either I wouldn’t be able to afford internet, or I’d be too busy working three jobs to pay my rent/bills to even think about writing.
Obviously, it’s not my ideal situation. I would much rather be living on my own, working, and not have to mooch off my mother like a thirty-year-old leech. But, Oh-Em-fkn-Gee, I sure am grateful that I’m able to.
And then there’s my dad. I don’t talk about my dad very much on here because I don’t see him frequently. He lives far away and he works a lot, and I work-but-not-at-a-job a lot, so getting in touch is difficult.
This blog also probably wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for him, too. My dad has been my financial rock during this increasingly terrifying stretch of unemployment. He gave a me credit card to use for food, clothes, and school. And boy does it get used! If it weren’t for that credit card, I’d be walking around naked right now (and trust me, no one wants to see that).
My dad pays for my school every semester. If it weren’t for him, I’d be an uneducated lump for the rest of my life (I’d also probably be homeless or working at a shitty job I hate because that’s my mom’s rule; I either need to be in school or working to live with her). Without my dad’s help, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself, because I wouldn’t be able to afford the things I need to progress my life forward.
On top of that? I may have mentioned I’m learning to drive. My dad agreed to pay for my car insurance until I found a job, so I can actually drive my car once I get my license.
I am so completely and utterly in awe of the generosity these two people have shown, just because we share genetics. My mom often says she doesn’t understand how some parents can sit by and let their children suffer, but we all know it happens very frequently. And I know I am #BLESSED to have parents who would rather give me a hand up than just drop kick me out of the nest to fly or die.
Because honestly, without them right now, I’d probably die.
I love you all.
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